I Think Julia Has Just Called Me Out
Welcome to Chapter Nine of The Artist's Way. How did you get on with Chapter Eight?
Okay, I have to be honest here…I was not looking forward to reading Chapter Eight. For a multitude of reasons: I want to get on with my editing, I’m getting a bit weary of The Artist’s Way and I don’t always get Julia’s meaning the first time I read it and I have to re-read - which means a chapter is not always a straightforward process. And, I was struggling with my general mood.
So I was a bit gloomy and cranky as I read through the first few pages. Yep, I could see that because my non-fiction recipe book about food in fiction was rejected (in 2013/2014) and I didn’t mourn the loss - probably because I mourning the loss of an actual human at that time - this could have led to my procrastinating. Yes, I need to “acknowledge and mourn the scars that are blocking” me. And yes, I need to turn the pain into energy and move forward.
The AGE AND TIME section snapped my attention back and even though I don’t (think) I say “I’m too old” for that, I do worry about getting too old and running out of time.
“I’m too old” is an evasive tactic. It is always used to avoid facing fear.
~ Julia Cameron.
It was the FILLING THE FORM section that really made me sit up. Uh oh, I thought. I’ve been rumbled.
“Creative people are dramatic, and we use negative drama to scare ourselves out of our creativity with this notion of wholesale and often destructive change.”
~ Julia Cameron
Basically it’s easier for me as someone with “an active addiction to anxiety” to worry about what might happen (going viral, selling millions of books and people wanting a piece of me and the end of my quiet life as I know it, being trolled, being forced to express an opinion then being cancelled if it’s one they don’t like and so on) rather than to simply get on with the work.
We think being creative is standing on the edge of a cliff and preparing to jump. When actually it’s the cliff path to one side with a handrail to hold onto that we can tackle with tiny steps.
We just have to do the work.
So I feel very seen. I feel Julia knows exactly what I’m doing. Which is great news because it means I’m not the only one doing it.
How did you react to Chapter Eight?
In Chapter Nine we’ll be looking at “recovering a sense of compassion”.
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I'm a bit exhausted with The artists way, or maybe I'm just a bit exhausted. Life keeps happening, in big (illness, death, travel) and small (laundry, meals, meetings) ways.
I've neglected MP and dates. I powered through chapter 8 this past weekend (fear of falling behind, my motivation)
I was pleasantly surprised at how much of the chapter I related to. Grieving artistic loss, and giving myself the gift of healing. I mean, who doesn't love a gift? Filling the form was another section that resonated strongly.
Thinking about the odds as emotional poison. I drew a martini glass 🍸 in my journal and wrote in some of the poison I tell myself. As a visual reminder not to drink poison.
A small serendipity this week, I did the Journaling task 'name the dream'. Later in the week I was at a meeting for women starting small business/home based business. It gave me great clarity when the presenter asked each of us to discuss our mission. JC knows what she is talking about, it's just time consuming and hard work.
Ready to dig into chapter 9
My Morning Pages are getting a bit of expressive and emotional ranting on them these past couple of weeks . I have had a medical / health diagnosis I really hadn’t been expecting …( was in count down for our 5 week European adventure of a life time trip away ) am only in the early stages of appointments as well…thus Julia has taken a bit of a back burner …but the pages are bing used . To me that’s what the Artists way is all about …somewhere to express your emotions , take a step back and pause , then hopefully see your way through to the next step with more positivity and less anxiety . Upwards and Onwards with the help of pen , coloured pencils and the trusted journal . Thanks Helen, I love the way you express your words …. Jo