CRUMBS FROM THE WRITING DESK #2
A Writer's Junk Journal Diary | Week Beginning 2nd June 2025
I’m trying something new. Twice a month, I thought I’d share what has been happening behind the scenes of my writing life during the week. I’m calling it a junk journal because it uses different media bits: text and video, photos, screenshots, audio, WhatsApp messages and so on. I’ve been inspired by the vlogs I used to create on TikTok, but wanted to do a ‘writing’ version of them.
PLUS, yesterday in the questionnaire I sent out, 53% of you said you’d like more behind-the-scenes of being a writer. So, here you are.
This is the first junk journal. It did have a paywall but you can now read it in its entirety.
This piece is too long to read in email, so click anywhere to open it up online or in the Substack app, and you can read it in its entirety.
Monday 2nd June
12 pm. Not a good start to the day.
messaged me about a writing session, but I was in the midst of an anxiety attack. I won’t go into what caused my anxiety right now, maybe this is something I can write about in the future, but it was debilitating. I remember sitting on the edge of my bed, my head…I don’t know quite how to describe it. It felt full, hugely overwhelming, claustrophobic with a sense of doom, and, right then, for a few minutes, I was at a terrifyingly low point.We did have a writing session later in the day, but what I wrote about is lost from my memory. The good news is, I started reading a book: Miss Beeton’s Murder Agency by Josie Lloyd, which was probably the best thing I could do for myself right then.
Tuesday 3rd June
1.15 pm. Doctor’s appointment. And of course, this meant I couldn’t do anything before the appointment because I was just in ‘waiting for the appointment to start’ mode. Does anyone else do that?
When I returned, relieved and proud of myself, but utterly wiped out, I carried on reading the book until I’d finished it.
7 pm.
of Hype Yourself was holding an online talk with Fiona Fletcher-Reid (previously known as Fiona Thomas), who wrote Work It Out: Finding Connection in the Digital Age Without Falling Apart and is now the features editor for Happiful Magazine.Lucy’s Substack focuses on helping creatives “to find the quiet confidence to talk about your work in a way that feels good for you” and, with my non-fiction book searching for an agent, I felt it was time to start thinking about putting myself out there *points to the world* by pitching to magazines and making my name and writing more broadly known.
It was a truly insightful event; I enjoyed it and look forward to attending more and learning from Lucy.
Wednesday 4th June
8 am. Dropped my daughter off at school for a maths exam. Did various household errands and chores, fetched my daughter, had a small snooze (I told you that the last two days wiped me out!)
2 pm. Online with Claire for our writing session. We talked about giving birth, which is related to my novel and made me want to get back to editing it. Which, in turn, made me think about all the projects I currently have:
My non-fiction book proposal, currently doing the rounds with agents, called Stop Hiding Under the Desk.
This Substack newsletter.
My meaty essays for Substack (I see these as part of Substack but also separate because they involve more research and so take a lot longer).
My novel in progress, Burnt Chocolate.
My next non-fiction book proposal that I have yet to start.
A joint writing project with Claire.
I’ve also been thinking more broadly about my Substack newsletter. I significantly reduced all the extras (like masterclasses, the book group and workshops) because of the return of burnout symptoms a year or so back. But now I’m thinking I’d like to step it up a gear. Only a small step. I’ve learned so many lessons. Which means that I’d have another project on the go:
Monthly masterclasses and/or workshops.
I love how my Substack is constantly evolving and the offshoots of ideas that come with it.
In the writing session today, I started sketching out the questions I could ask you, my readers, to find out more about you and to see if the direction I’m thinking of going in would be useful to you.
I’d convinced myself that I hadn’t started work as I hadn’t started writing yet, but realised everything I’d been doing (the ideas, the journaling and so on) is work and absolutely part of the process.
4 pm. Moved on from the ideas and started to work on a query email for a literary agent. Sent that out. Big tick.
4.30 pm. Finished off my submission to Oneworld publishers (which must be what I was working on on the Monday!) They had a Word form to fill in, so I was adapting a lot of my proposal for that. Pressed send on that email. Another big tick.
I found that Oneworld, the publisher, was accepting submissions directly (i.e., without an agent) through a Substack newsletter by
. So thank you, Kris!My son, who has just finished his second year at university, surprised me with a visit, which was lovely.
Thursday 5th June
No work done today. I had too many life bits and bobs to do, my son was home, I wanted to meet my friend, my daughter had another exam, and I made a roast chicken for our dinner to celebrate being reunited as a family of four.
However, some prints I’d ordered from Etsy arrived. These are from BooksnBobs.
Friday 6th June
11 am. A slow start as my daughter doesn’t have an exam until 1.15 pm. But I find myself at my desk, digging into some masterclasses I’d held in the past and working on the questionnaire.
Attending Lucy Werner’s talk earlier in the week reminded me of the masterclasses and workshops I used to hold. Masterclasses on becoming creatively confident, fear of success and failure, writing online and more. I enjoyed them a lot, but they were a victim of my burnout and cutbacks.
When I cut back, I also lost a large part of my income. And, at the moment, my income is pretty much coming from one income stream - this newsletter. This is a dangerous situation to be in, I know I need to diversify and add more streams to my business once again. This is yet another project to add to my list.
I’m also aware that there are a lot more writers on Substack now, and a lot more asking for subscribers to ‘support’ their writing. I’m also aware that subscribers cannot support all writers they enjoy because they’d be broke. I reduced my annual subscription to £20 because of this. I wanted to make it cheaper, especially when prices for food and energy etc, are going up. Instead of asking for support, I want to give something useful and practical in return. Not that I’m dismissing or devaluing my writing, I know my writing is worth something. But my mind was beginning to churn with ideas.
This note (above) is one I wrote on my phone as I worked through my developing thoughts.
Incidentally, I’ve just found another note on my phone from Tuesday at half past midnight. I’ve no idea what it refers to or means:
5.20 pm. I finally finished the questionnaire and pressed publish. A few hours later, I found I’d made a mistake in the very first question, but such is the way. If you’d like to add your thoughts, I’d love to hear them. It’s open for another six days.
You know a lot about me, now help me understand you.
I’ve been having ideas about what I could add to my Substack, now that burnout seems to be behind me. And as there are now a lot more of you than there were when I first started out, I’d love to get …
Saturday 7th June
4 pm. I don’t always write at the weekend, but here I am. It’s gone very dark, there has been a hint of thunder, and the rain has provided a lovely soundtrack. Perfect writing conditions. Claire is also beavering away on the other side of our Zoom call and I’m very happy and very content.
This week has been very up and down. Well, it started on a low note but got better. Due to my daughter having exams and being on study leave, I’m out of my normal routine and writing in the afternoon and evening (it’s currently 6.45 pm) rather than during the day. But I’m not giving myself a hard time about slower mornings or taking time off. I’m doing what I need to do to look after myself and my daughter during this stressful and unusual time
I write more behind-the-scenes essays behind the paywall for paid subscribers. Such as Behind-the-Scenes of an Agatha Christie Essay where I shared how it felt to be writing something out of my comfort zone, what gave me the initial spark and what my research and writing process looked like.
If you’d like to upgrade to access more of these essays, then click below:
Alternatively, if you fancy it, you can buy me a coffee.
These junk journals are brilliant, Helen! I think it’s just as enlightening for you to realise how much you’ve done/thought/researched/actioned in a week! 🙌🏻🍄
This was such a hoot to read your junk journal and I know it could not have been easy to share . However, it’s this is another avenue you could explore , in a diary format? Readers are always curious to know about writers writing processes. Now I do not feel alone when it’s simply so normal as a writer to go through the ups and downs in our own writers way.
I was so thrilled to see Enid Blyton’s cards! Is this your cryptic way of saying , this is your next non- fiction project? Please say yes!